What changed?

Lisa and I have thought about this a long time. The purchase of a gun clearly takes us off the fence. On one hand we are struggling if it is contradictory to our support of a dear friend that was permanently disabled by gun violence and the other, worrying about being in a position to not protect ourselves. I have owned a gun in the past; a 410 shotgun I won in a Ducks Unlimited raffle that I sold 30+ years after the kids were born. I rarely used it anyway and only for shooting clay pigeons, so selling it was simple. As the years went by and gun violence continued to escalate, it was easy to take a position against guns, particularly assault rifles. I didn’t shoot and had enough other hobbies to occupy my time, so guns weren’t part of my life. Over time, guns became more polarizing and it seemed to me that gun-owners were unreasonable and unbending in their refusal to have a conversation about the pain and suffering these weapons were causing. This opinion continued to percolate over the years; fueled by the steady stream of shootings on the news.

I learned to keep my opinions to myself. Not out of fear but to eliminate the possibility of an argument I really didn’t want to have. My neutrality was about to change. During a company sponsored class, I stopped by to visit and say hello to any of my customers that may be attending. It was the lunch break, so the small group was chatting while eating their sandwiches. As the conversation took different directions, it finally stopped on guns, the 2nd amendment and politics. The instructor is a close, long-time friend who has an opinion completely opposite of mine, and is happy to share that opinion. As I listened, the gun rhetoric ramped up and before I knew it, I was appearing to support his views. I finally called bullshit and a heated exchange ensued. Good or bad the students seemed to hold the same opinion as the instructor so I fought the fight alone. We each took our shots to express our views and why we felt it important. After 5-10 minutes of this we both realized it needed to be ratcheted down so the students didn’t feel any more uncomfortable then we had made them. The mood lightened, the topic changed and lunch adjourned to head back to the shop.

Something else happened though. It had always been easy for me to disagree with the TV. I wasn’t vested in whoever was offering their opinion and I could argue without reprisal. I could see some of their points but generally it came across as blindly pushing an agenda that I couldn’t agree with. This was different. This was someone I held in high regard and considered a friend so I needed to reevaluate how to accept or reject his arguments. This was not someone on TV who’s viewpoint I could just dismiss; he was as passionate about his views as I was mine. After our exchange and with the students occupied in the shop again we shook hands. We are probably even better friends now. As I talked to my wife about this exchange, we both agreed it is a complex and difficult problem but agreed it was core to our constitution. Good or bad the world can be a dangerous place and we can’t be naive about that fact. We also agreed that we have never had a hobby we both enjoyed and thought this may be it. I will let you know.